Your parent or loved one has always been there for you, and you have their best interests at heart. Now, you feel they may no longer be safe or happy living at home. They may need more care then they are able to get at home, be isolated from friends or activities they love, or simply not be able to keep up with the daily chores of home maintenance and cooking.

You know it’s time for you both to look at their senior living options, and you want to bring it up in the most understanding and respectful way possible. Below, we’ve compiled 7 tips to help you have a meaningful conversation with your loved one.

Is your loved one bringing a pet with them? See our blog post on pets for tips on ensuring they have a smooth transition.

For more tips, or to see your next steps, download our free guide for loved ones.

1. Conversation
   Open the subject with your loved one at a calm moment, and listen to any concerns they may have. Try to come to the conversation with an open mind, willing to hear what they have to say. This is a discussion, not a grand debate. Be willing to look at all sides of the situation and try to understand their concerns.
   
   
2. Plan ahead before you talk
   You should anticipate questions and concerns before you actually sit down to this discussion with your loved one. Write down the questions you expect and their answers so you’ll be ready for different scenarios. You should also prepare materials by looking at some of the best retirement residence in your area and getting information and photos of them.

3. Present the benefits
   There are many benefits to living in a seniors’ residence, and these should be first and foremost in your mind. When you bring up the idea of moving to a community, make sure you give them all the highlights first.
   
   A few benefits might include:

• Opportunities to socialize without having to drive anywhere
• Favorite activities available
• Medical care when needed
• No need to cook
• No home-maintenance responsibilities
• Private dining or event room available for hosting family gatherings

4. Bring support
   When you’re talking to an elderly family member about possibly moving into a retirement community, keep in mind that it may be easier if you have someone else there. A little backup is always a good idea, but be careful that you don’t make your loved one feel overwhelmed or pushed into making a choice. This is something that has to work for everyone, and a little support on your side, particularly if you know your loved one will react strongly, will help.

5. Make them part of the decision-making process
   Your loved one should have say in where and when they move to a senior living community. This doesn’t mean you have to leave everything up to them, but since they are the one who will be living in the community, it’s a good idea to offer some choices and let them make a guided decision.

6. Give them time to consider
   Once you and your loved one have spoken about the options give them some time to think. You may want to provide further reading material and then let them consider their options. It’s best to work slowly and help everyone understand that community living is the best option at this point in time.

7. Take a tour, or a virtual tour, of the residences
   You can’t decide whether or not to live somewhere without seeing it first. Photos may give you a good idea of what the space is like, but there’s no substitute for actually touring the space. Any retirement residence should be happy to give you an in-person or virtual tour and let you enjoy a meal.

Wondering what comes next or need more advice? Download our Guide for Loved Ones to learn more.